ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
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OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need _____________________________
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot morewilling to die.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs andcackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doingthe same thing to them at funerals.
Sunday 9 March 2008
Wednesday 5 March 2008
been tagged again
1. WHAT WERE YOU DOING 10 YEARS AGO?
working at pontins in brean sands, would have just started about now, and loved every minute of it(well the ones i can remember anyway)
2.WHAT WERE YOU DOING 1 YEAR AGO?probably trying to catch up on some sleep and get our baby son into a daily routine, and sort his big sis out as she became quite rebellious after he was born
.3. NAME YOUR 5 FAVOURITE SNACKS chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate. rich tea biscuits and toast
4.NAME 5 THINGS YOU WOULD DO IF YOU WERE A MILLIONAIREI travel a lot, buy several homes in different countries, make sure my family were safe and secure, buy the pub next door to me and turn it into a proper community centre and buy lots and lots of craft goodies 5.NAME 5 THINGS YOU LIKE DOING Crafting, camping, swimming, having a drink and a laugh with good friends, spending time with my kids (not necessarilly in that order)
.6.NAME 5 THINGS YOU WOULD NEVER WEAR AGAIN, mini skirts, fur, boob tube, any shoes, boots, sandals with a heel higher than 1" or dungarees
7.NAME YOUR 5 FAVOURITE TOYS!my cabbage patch kids millie and christopher(now 20 odd years old) my craft robo, my computer, my daughters illumination station, and finally my digital camera
now who to tag
hmmmmmmmm i will have a think and get back to you about that one
natx x x
working at pontins in brean sands, would have just started about now, and loved every minute of it(well the ones i can remember anyway)
2.WHAT WERE YOU DOING 1 YEAR AGO?probably trying to catch up on some sleep and get our baby son into a daily routine, and sort his big sis out as she became quite rebellious after he was born
.3. NAME YOUR 5 FAVOURITE SNACKS chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate. rich tea biscuits and toast
4.NAME 5 THINGS YOU WOULD DO IF YOU WERE A MILLIONAIREI travel a lot, buy several homes in different countries, make sure my family were safe and secure, buy the pub next door to me and turn it into a proper community centre and buy lots and lots of craft goodies 5.NAME 5 THINGS YOU LIKE DOING Crafting, camping, swimming, having a drink and a laugh with good friends, spending time with my kids (not necessarilly in that order)
.6.NAME 5 THINGS YOU WOULD NEVER WEAR AGAIN, mini skirts, fur, boob tube, any shoes, boots, sandals with a heel higher than 1" or dungarees
7.NAME YOUR 5 FAVOURITE TOYS!my cabbage patch kids millie and christopher(now 20 odd years old) my craft robo, my computer, my daughters illumination station, and finally my digital camera
now who to tag
hmmmmmmmm i will have a think and get back to you about that one
natx x x
yet another joke
A woman in her fifties is at home happily jumping, unclothed, on her bed and squealing with delight.
Her husband watches her for a while and asks, 'Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What's the matter with you?'
The woman continues to bounce on the bed and says, 'I don't care what y ou think, I just came from having a mammogram, and the doctor says that not only am I healthy, but I have the breasts of an 18 year-old.'
The husband replies, 'What did he say about your 55-year old arse?'
She replied, 'Your name didn't come up.'
Her husband watches her for a while and asks, 'Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What's the matter with you?'
The woman continues to bounce on the bed and says, 'I don't care what y ou think, I just came from having a mammogram, and the doctor says that not only am I healthy, but I have the breasts of an 18 year-old.'
The husband replies, 'What did he say about your 55-year old arse?'
She replied, 'Your name didn't come up.'
face book
if anybody is a member of facebook and would like to consider adding me to you list of friends please feel free to do so, i love playing scabulous, scramble knighthood, blackjack an poker.
i am down as natalie reilly williams and i am the only one there when you enter the name in its entirity, hope to speak to you soon, as i am always looking for new friends especially ones with the same love of crafting, as i know no-one in the flesh with who i can discuss it properly
nat x x
i am down as natalie reilly williams and i am the only one there when you enter the name in its entirity, hope to speak to you soon, as i am always looking for new friends especially ones with the same love of crafting, as i know no-one in the flesh with who i can discuss it properly
nat x x
card for mothers day
three different views of the slide up card i made for my mum for mothers day, the rose decoupage image and the backing papers are from the roses cd from create and craft, i think it looks quite real though you cannot really tell from these pics. the idea for the card itself came after watching an episode of moovision from a few weeks ago.
my mum loved it and i must say even i was impressed in the end after an ititial unsurity.
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